He has been gone a while now and the pain still digs deeper into this abyss that I'm struggling to fill. People say that it will get better with time... but will it, really? I keep telling myself that I'm ok, but am I really? I face each day desperate to forget, desperate to rid myself of thoughts about him and his lingering spirit and will I ever?
Truth is, this is something that will never go away, something I will never forget but thank God that pain subsides and it fades with time, it really does.
Our relationship was never perfect and a lot of the flaws are slowly creeping out of dark corners now. However he is passed on and I need to deal with the weight on my own. I'm forced to be strong, forced to grow up, forced to face reality... yeah shit is real.
So when I ask myself, why me? Theres no answer, just frustrating echoes from my empty core. I don't know, maybe, this was set for me to encounter and I'd eventually get the most fulfilling experience out of it. Honestly... i don't know, these things have a way of revealing a mysterious resolution in the end ...i wait for that end.
In the meantime, I celebrate my nunu's life today as I celebrate his birthday...
Happy Birthday Monde, you left me too soon and I miss you still. Love you forever..
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