Day 30 - Theres no burger... like a Jo-burger!

I'll be checking out the newest product out of the South African film industry this weekend!

JOZI! Coming out the 26th February!

Day 63

Honestly... I miss him & it hurts deeply.

Day 62 - this too shall pass

When a friend told me, a week after Monde's death, that this too shall pass, I felt like shooting him down.

Two months down the line... i know exactly what he meant.  Tragedy is like an earthquake, it comes unexpectedly, shakes you enormously and leaves you lifeless suddenly.  The aftershock kicks you while you're down and the days are clouded for the longest time.

And then the sun comes out and the streams fill up and the birds sing again. Then new beginnings are the newest dawn.

yeah its all fairytale like but its real, its been so real to me.  Not once did I think that I would smile with sun again or hear my own laughter.

Its two months today... even though I sometimes wish that he could call or step through the door returning from the longest trip, I know that it wont happen.

He is never coming back and thats starting to hit home for me... ACCEPTANCE.

Day 29

Is this what OUR World Cup means to us?
The face of an international star on one of Jozi's tallest buildings?
Where's our sense of pride for our own local soccer stars?
Just my 2 cents... I'm open for correction.

Day 28 - my forever favorites

Classic jams...

Day 28

I'm still not over Avatar...

Day 20/21 - post Valentines day and what seems to be a continuation into today..

The last time I celebrated Valentine's day must have been in primary school. Even then it was mandatory that we set up stalls and sell mugs with cheesy I love you nonsense, red roses, teddy bears, chocolates and self-made cards. All in celebration of St Valentine. It all seemed natural then that there's one day in the year were love is excessively expressed. Well, its sickening! Even as I write now I feel nauseous! So Valentine's day is the great day of love - what is love?? No one still has found a unanimous answer to that infamous question. Ok, so say we all have our own definition of what love is, fair enough. I think love is an unreacheable dream that fades into nothingness once you finally reach it but I will not shove my cynicism down anyone's throat. I've given up on love & that's ok for me, I'll pick it up on my way to somewhere someday. So ja, Valentine's day is a commercialised attempt to savor the sentiments of love etc. etc. I think it kills it. Everything gets caught up in prices and the colour of a wrapper and love is lost. Its superficial and empty. Boring and irritating. Love isn't futile and insincere. It tells a story and finds its place within you, nowhere the surface. Yeah, but its Valetine's day, a day in which 'lovers' get pathetically soppy. Then again its only my opinion. I love it!!

Day 49

I now believe that it gets better. I believe that it heals. I believe that the pain subsides. Nostalgia and memories mask the confusion that still digs into my wounds. But I see my scars and I believe that I'm healing. Although I can't get my mind around the blame and anger that towers over me and strives to break me. How can the people that know how much I loved my man think I would hurt him?? The people that saw me at his side all day embracing him tenderly and giving him life. How could they? Why do they blame me?
Enveloped within myself the things I thought I had figured out, I have to start learning again. The imagined world is not enough so reality it is. I believe I've learnt never to compromise my being